Makes me wonder

Sometimes life throws curve balls at us. Sometimes we see them coming and can prepare, other times we get hit blindsided. I've been hit blindsided a few times myself and know others that have had it happen recently. Sometimes it's easier when we can't prepare, so we don't get anxious or nervous. In watching some friends go through some ridiculously awful things, I'm amazed at how different people manage their lives and how the instinct for basic survival can take over and power us through it all.

It takes strength, courage, love, confidence, support, and a never ending supply of patience to get through things that we think will break us. We've all faced tough times, some worse than others. Reaching out for support from those around us is critical. It often feels easier to curl up in a ball and try to forget the rest of the world exists than to face the problems. And sometimes we really need to do that for a bit, allow ourselves to grieve, mourn, release the sadness before it consumes us. But then, life requires us to unfold from the ball, stand up and figure out how to move forward.

I recently read a book written by John Edwards' wife, maybe a year or two ago. I knew a little bit about her, that she had battled cancer and that her husband has chosen infidelity in a painfully public way. But I didn't know that they also had a son who was killed in a fluke car accident at the age of 16. Her cancer was in remission and has spread (at least at the time she wrote this particular book). Her marriage, which had been her rock, was irreversibly shaken. She thought she could count on him, but it turned out she had to figure out a new way to live, to find new reasons to face each day and make them count. She's done that with her life.

The book describes the path that Elizabeth Edwards took to find meaning in each day. She details her own journey and recognizes that each person needs to find their own path through the rough patches of life. No one way will work for everyone. The important part is to pick up, decide that life is worth living, and find a way that will work for you.

Of course, this is easier said than done. I know that. Life is hard and filled with potholes, but it's also good and filled with joys. I try to remember that on my own dark days, and to provide the support others around me need as they navigate their journeys. The road of life is bumpy, but it is filled with love and joy too. People are resilient and strong, as long as they're willing to let themselves be.